The sights, sounds, and smells of fall are upon us. The smell of cotton defoliant in the air has become comforting to me reassuring me that exciting changes are on the horizon. The leaves have finally started to turn colors and turn loose, as I notice them congregating under my carport and crunching under my feet. The morning air has a damp coolness as opposed to the thick humid heavy air of the summer in the delta. Football is in full swing and homecoming has come and gone. College football fills our Saturdays.  Fall festivals fill our calendars and the county fair promises cotton candy, corn dogs, and candy apples. The boys have hopes of sweet kisses on the farris wheel, as do I ! Nascar continues as the drivers race for the chase. The sounds of the cars blaring through my living room brings me much comfort as I grew up to this sound and although this has become my home, it makes me feel closer to my roots. It's funny when you think back on when and where you grew up, you miss those things, but even if you went back today, they're all gone. Everything is different. Nothing is the same. I do believe that I have reached my prime in life. I certainly hopes it lasts a while. I finally feel in the pit of my soul and know in the depths of my heart that I am exactly where God wants me to be. The path that I had to travel to get here was painfully long and winding, nonetheless worth every moment. Every tear, every sweat drop of blood. The peace that only God can provide is highly underrated and definitely taken for granted. When you are completely content and full of joy with what God has provided you with even when there are things that you want and don't have..... you know you have the peace of God and are in Gods will. I long to give back to God. Even though I realize that no matter what I give, it would never be enough, I wanna give back. I want to honor Him. For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 28:11

Until next time,

jo

Rolling right along

So, here we are rolling right through September, one sweet day at a time! My time just seems to fly by! My first week of work is under my belt and it went quite well I must say. The beginning of anything can be quite overwhelming but with each day, week, month, that passes it becomes more and more natural. The temps are cooling off and football is officially in the air. I love it. Without school, now I can enjoy the simple things in life, catching those Kodak moments, and maybe even trying those homemade Cinnamon rolls that have been quietly whispering my name. I haven't been exactly what I have wanted to be lately. I want and strive to be a better mom. I want to be a better wife. I yearn to be more relaxed, laid back, although, it is nowhere in my genetic makeup whatsoever. It is a constant struggle, that with the help of my Lord I am bound to over come. I have to stop and ask myself, "in the big picture, is it really that big of a deal?" I pray for a gentle spirit. A gentle loving spirit. Sometimes all the pressures of this world can really get to us. Jesus is my rock. It is so important to lean on Him. When we are weak, He is strong. I want to reach out to others, be giving, tip big, perform random acts of kindness, demonstrate love to strangers, forgive those who have hurt me, enjoy life, love life, sing in the storms, dance in the rain, pray through the pain, treasure kisses from my soul mate, commit his smile to my memory, play his laughter over and over in my head when I miss him, make my kids laugh, fall asleep to the rhythm of his heart with my head on his strong chest, be carefree, ride with no destination in mind, feed the birds, get lost in his eyes, sing in the truck at the top of my lungs, serve God with all that I do, make my parents proud, make my kids proud, camp in a tent, watch the leaves change colors before they let go, stay up late, worry about absolutely nothing, taking it all in, giving it all back. Just sayin........aj

Mondays

Mondays in my world have now taken on a new meaning and hold new hope for our future as a family. For the past year my Mondays started on Sunday night with a sickening dread in the pit of my stomach and I had to take 12.5 mg of benadryl just to be able to go to sleep. Then, begrudgingly, I arose at 4am in order to make it to class by 8am and I am a morning person! All day, we endured class after class after class and if we were lucky they would let us out early at 630 pm for the 2.5 hour ride home. Now, my Sunday nights are nice and relaxed as we watch football and I type this meaningless blog. This will be my first Monday at work as a Board Certified Nurse Practitioner. I do realize that I keep making a big deal out of that, but in our world, it kinda is. OK, it really is. I worry about all the little things that I sit here and keep telling myself that the Lord has already taken care of all these little things that I am worried about. There are four pt rooms. I wonder if the doc will give me two rooms or just tell me which pts he wants me to see. Ugh, it will feel so uncomfortable until I find a routine. Do I come home for lunch or do I stick around? What do I do with all the junk the previous NP left in the office that is now mine? Tons of little questions are floating around in my head. At the end of the day, each day, I hope to have helped someone, not killed anyone, and avoid making the doc think I am a complete idiot. I'll be sure to let you know how it goes. Not that anyone really reads this or if they do that they even care. Maybe my grandchildren will somehow stumble across my random thoughts and get something out of them. For the record, at the age of 32, I have decided that my grandchildren will call me "Sugar".

God Bless, aj

Flower Box Phase 2

Moving right along!! Potting soil next. Then we'll need a new box and a flower plan! :) One happy girl

The adorable Flower box my sweet hubby has started for me! We should finish it today. I call myself helping, but I'm pretty sure I'm not that much of a help. But I'm right there, just in case ;)! I am so excited! We're finally getting some things done we have talked and dreamed about for three years. I can't wait to post a finished pic. Now, to decide what flowers to arrange in it when we get it completed.Oh, and of course we'll need a new mailbox. I think we've gottent the goody out of this one. I'll be sure to include it in the next shot. Any suggestions are welcome! Happy Saturday to all :) aj

Cooler Weather, change is among us

Thanks to Hurricane Lee we have enjoyed some significantly cooler temps this past week. This week seemed like it really flew by as 4 day work weeks usually do. "Work week"; uh, kinda has a ring to it now that I actually have a JOB!! I am so super excited about getting my career up and running. To bring closure to my last entry, the lava cake turned out GREAT as I had none left! The slaw was almost like my momma's but not quite. The lists are still a work in progress. I will complete mine during my morning quiet time tomorrow and I'm still working on Tim with his. The boys were eager to do one and I'm not surprised as I realize for the most part, they missed the point as it turned out to be more of a Santa wish list. I worked most of this week getting things geared up at my new job! I met my Doc that I will be working with and I even have my own office! Tons of paperwork and housekeeping done at work this week, filling out form after form. One lecture they left out of the curriculum at school was "What to do AFTER Graduation". Wow. I graduated Aug 2nd and in the second week of September I am still trying to get all my ducks in a row with my license, certification, NPI number, NP protocol, Pharmacy access, Prescription Pads, Monogramming my Lab coats,  Business cards, ect. I am eager to start taking care of patients Monday! I am starting at 4 days a week until probably Christmas. I am looking forward to the change in seasons as well as what accompanies these changes. The cooler air, crisp breeze, leaves turning red, golden, brown, then turning loose and drifting lazily to the grass which contains dying grass. Before long, I will tackle those candy apples once again for the Harvest Carnival, but this time I'm all the wiser..... Roasting weenies and marshmallows; the crickets are among us as they always invade our home this time of year. Football games, speaking of which, BOTH my baby boys were on the field at the same time last night!! They lost the game but they certainly played hard. I was so nervous for them. They really did good, I am so proud of them.The days will soon become shorter and the nights cooler. As much as I am looking forward to the changes, I look forward to 2012. I am calling this our COMEBACK year. Please give all honor and glory to our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Serve Him with all you have......

Clear eyes, full hearts, can't lose,
jo

Change of Heart

Wow, what an amazing weekend so far! This is my very first holiday weekend since I finished school and passed the boards so it is the first time in years that I have hosted guests and not had to study or work on my thesis! It has been incredibly awesome!! I  have had a house full of people and kids and that makes my heart so happy! I have tried recipes that I have yearned so badly to try and they turned out great! I still have more to try today!! I LOVE cooking and photography and have enjoyed both so much this weekend! I even made homemade pizza from scratch. Yes, scratch as in yeast, flour and such for the homemade crust and the sauce from fresh tomatoes, onions, and bell peppers. It was delicious!! Today I will try coleslaw for the first time and chocolate lava cake. The boys have had overnight company and are really enjoying themselves and Tim has been harvesting our corn and he is like a kid at Christmas to say the least. It seems a little early to tell just how the corn crop is going to turn out, but we have asked the Lord to bless it and we are letting Him take it from here. :) It feels so wonderful not to have notes in my face constantly studying every free minute, there are no words in our English vocabulary to adequately describe it. So this morning after I cleaned the kitchen from the Hurricane Amy jo that blew through it yesterday and washing the endless loads of laundry from dirty little boys, I sat down for my quiet time with the Lord. I just can't focus if I know I have things that need to be taken care of. So, He is speaking to my heart about some things financially as we are approaching, at a slow steady pace, the ever present light at the end of the tunnel and I am listening intently, making mental notes if you will. Praise God I have a job! I am certainly excited about it and will start next week. It's at the clinic in Tchula and I just know I am going to love it there. It has been so long since I started a new job......anyway, sorry I got off track a little bit there. So during my quiet time, I remembered a list I had made several years ago, when I was deep in the trenches of my studie, of things that I wanted and wanted to do after graduation and whenever I became discouraged or frustrated I would look at this list. I haven't looked at it quite some time, and it was right where I had safely tucked it away. I was quite shocked when I read the many things on the list. It's funny how much can happen in 12 months, much less three years. The desires of my heart have apparently changed vastly as many of the things on this proverbial list aren't so important to me anymore. Some of them even seem quite silly to me now, while others seemed close to impossible at the time, now seem very attainable. I never would have imagined that my outlook on life and the things in this world would have changed as drastically as they have. I reached a point in my life where Pam cooking spray and mouthwash were luxury items, not necessity items. I think everyone should experience this in life at least once. Maybe I'll share some of the things on this list later, maybe I won't, I don't know. I am still in shock as I just can hardly believe how much my outlook and heart have changed. I thought this entry would be maybe a paragraph long, apparently I had more on my mind than I thought! As we embrace my new job, harvest 2011, and plan for farming next year, I will pray over and contemplate how the Lord would have us handle our finances. How would He have us to get back on top of things as we have fallen behind during these lean years? I want to make him proud in all that I do. How would He have us to serve Him and give back to Him? I plan to make a list of things that we need and bills that need to be taken care of and prioritize this list. Although I have turned over that new leaf and am enjoying my new relaxed grip on this life, I still like lists!! I think they are extremely beneficial! As a matter of fact, he doesn't know it yet, but I am going to ask Tim to make a list too (own his own) and have him prioritize the items on that list as well. Better yet, the boys can too. This will be a great way to see where everybody in the family stands and see what is important to them. Wow, what a GREAT idea!!! I love a brainstorming moment!! This should turn out to be very interesting considering I am the book keeper of the family and manage all the finances and payments......I feel quite certain that our lists will differ greatly. I sincerely apologize that this entry was so miserably long. I had no idea this was all welled up inside of my heart!!! Thanks for being patient and hanging in there with me. 

Until next time,
jo